Its a Saturday night and like most Saturdays I have spent time talking and praying with and for my dearest friend who is a minister.What a precious time we have had tonight. It is hard to believe that our friendship is only a few months short of being 15 years, and it is one that I have I have learned and grown in.
Let me tell you the story of how our friendship began. I had not gone to church for a while and had been praying and asking God to show me where I should be going to church. God began to move in my heart and show me what place I should attend. My first thought was no God I don't want to go there. This church was the last one that I wanted to attend. I wrestled with God about this for a number of weeks, but the more I resisted the More I knew I had to go to this church. So finally I relented and obeyed what God had laid on my heart. Believe me I was probably one of the least enthusiastic congregants attending, but I stayed. A few weeks later God began to move my heart again. This time though it was to call the pastor and offer myself to spend time each week praying for him. Oh great I thought first off he the minister didn't even know me and second who was I to do this with a minister after all I am just an ordinary guy, this is a job for those super spiritual people or members of the board. Again I went into my I don't want to do this, I mean I really don't want to do this. I didn't want to be getting up and meeting with someone at 7:30 in the morning on a Saturday least of all praying with him. Boy I fought this one, again the more I resisted the more I knew this was what I was supposed to do. So I finally phoned him and said I would like to meet with you and pray with you and for you every week. I sensed a degree of caution in his voice but he agreed and said that Saturday at 7:00 would be good, oh brother this was even earlier than I wanted so I agreed and said I will meet you at the church on Saturday morning. Brief pause then he clarified himself it wasn't to be in the morning but in the evening, well that was my first Praise the Lord in our relationship. For the first few months we spent time talking and praying, then we realized we both played violins so we started taking time playing music together. Later as he felt comfortable we started working together on the Praise and Worship for the church on Sundays. Well those Saturdays began to be special the times of worship the two of had, have been by far the greatest time of Praise and Worship I have ever had and our times of talking and praying lengthened and were so precious. Once he moved our time together was over but not our time of talking and praying, we have continued on with this now for almost 15 years. Maybe not as consistent as we once were but you know we still try and spend time every Saturday around 7:00pm.
So what is the purpose of this story. Well the purpose is to show you that ministers have needs just like you and I. They have physical , emotional, mental and spiritual needs. They are humans too and isolation from having a true friend is difficult for them as well. In seeing my dads life( a minister), my cousins life(a minister) and my friends life and many other ministers it is a lonely job. They can't start sharing their life's problems or personal conflicts or struggles with members of the congregation, because sometimes (unfortunately) they don't know whom they can trust and gossip about a minister is a travesty of the church. Pastors struggle with their families with their kids and probably more so( I was after all a pastors kid). They struggle financially,because most Churches are small and can't afford to pay a minister what he is really worth. Or(and I have heard this one) we don't pay the minister alot because we have to keep him humble if he got paid to much he may lose his humility. Think about that one will you how would you like your boss to not pay you what he should because he figured you may get to proud if you get paid to much. And he felt it was his duty to keep you humble.I am sure you would dance for joy and say thank you.
To put pastors on a unattainable pedestal is not fair to them either. When you do this if they show signs of being human in ways you don't agree with it gives you the excuse to criticize them in ways they should never be criticized. Do you realize how hard it is to be a pastor. Are you there when they get a call in the middle of the night that one of the congregation has passed away and they have to go out and bring comfort to the family. Are you there when they council people and hear all the problems that they have and try to give them hope and encouragement. Do you realize how many hours they spend in preparing the messages for the services he or she leads.
I have become close friends with a minister as I have stated. I do not take that friendship lightly. I have come to understand that as you take on that role you are there to lift up and support them. To be there when they need a friend , when they need an ear. This is not something you do for the glory, you do it because God has called you to do it and if he hasn't called you don't do its not fair to the minister. Never enter into that with selfish motives because God won't bless it. You are there to help carry the load and the spiritual battle that goes along with that relationship.
I had thought of posting pictures of different people to see if you could tell who was a pastor and who wasn't but if you look at people in a mall or on the street can you tell who is or isn't a minister. Not likely unless they are wearing vestments. They are just like you and I.
Know this, as they are called to teach and preach they do realize that they will be held accountable for what they have taught, more than you and I will be. They need your support, they need your prayers. Pastors need Godly people to sit on their boards. They don't need yes people but people who will seek out Gods will and leading.
A couple of suggestions, don't say you will pray for them if you won't , don't just say it was a good message if you really didn't listen to what was being said. Don't patronize them. Don't go into church without a heart that is prepared to hear what God has to say to you through this man who is your pastor.Do NOT be one that criticize your pastor behind his back and before you criticize them check out your own life maybe there are things you need to get right with God and not your minister. Do not enter into a relationship as I have with a minister unless God has really really called you,I know I stated this before but I must emphasize this again.
You know two of the biggest reason Churches try and get rid of ministers are there are people that want power and they do not want to submit to the authority that the minister has before you and God. Two people have come under conviction because of what is being preached and they can't stand the conviction because the minister is preaching the word of God.
So maybe its time you just take some time and realize what a pastor is, his/her trials etc. No they are not perfect, but they have such a challenging calling that most of us wouldn't be able to do. So next time you are in church give your minister a warm hand shake tell him/ her you love them. Tell them and show them that you appreciate them. They do like honesty and sincerity. Be a strength to them and not a weakness.You will find out how much more you will get from his/her messages.
So who are pastors? They are people like you and I except their calling is more challenging then yours or mine.
God Bless you as you learn how be a strength to your minister or pastor.
DCW
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